Poetry from Midlife: Deep Bloom
Mon, 8/02/10 – 14:44 | No Comment

I want to live
right through to the end in full frontal
engagement, awake to everything.

Read the full story »
Our Bodies

What We See In The Mirror and How We Feel About It

Our Careers

The work that we do and that we wish we did

Our Minds

Our emotional, spiritual, and intellectual selves

Our Relationships

Mates, children, parents, siblings, friends

Our World

What we think about what’s happening outside our door

ByJane »

My Feet Hurt
Fri, 5/02/10 – 1:35 | 12 Comments

Yes they do. Every day. In almost every way. This, as much as used-up eggs and hot flashes, seems to be a fact of my midlife.

Once, in my glory days, I could wear any number of cute little shoes with impunity. They were, in fact, the balm to an ego smashed by a body that was somewhat larger than the clothes that had always fit it. If I didn’t like the way said body looked in the dressing room mirror, well, the shoe department mirror is very short and only reflects one’s lower legs. And that part of my body is still good, and not, so I thought, growing or changing or letting me down.

I was, I confess it here, a shoe snob. Wear crappy clothes, dress straight out of Target, but if your shoes are good (i.e., not straight out of Target), you can get away with almost anything. Wear a fantastic outfit, something from Saks or BCBG and if your shoes are not equal in style and provenance, then you’ve blown the chance to look fantastic. I still stand by that basic principle of fashion.

I wasn’t one of those willing to endure pain for those cute shoes. I was just one of those for whom most shoes in size 8.5 or 9 fit. While I sympathized with those who had Problem Feet and had to wear Special Shoes, I couldn’t imagine that would ever happen to me. Oh, the folly of youth…

Here’s what happens when your feet go bad on you. They get wider. Who knew that that’s what they meant by middle-aged spread. They get larger. Or something or other has caused every pair of shoes in my huge collection to NOT FIT. Like some Mafia princess, I kept my shoes stacked in plastic boxes with identifying labels. Now they’re scattered around my closet where I’ve flung them in disgust at their NOT FITTING.

Here’s another thing that happens in midlife: the balls of your feet get all thin and meager. This means that you’re walking on foot bone bereft of padding. This is not great for going barefoot, especially if your floors are, like mine, ceramic tile. It’s not great for wearing those really high high heels that are in fashion now, because they throw all of your weight onto the balls of your feet. Dermatologists have a cure for this. They shoot Restylane into the bottom of your foot, giving you a little cushion of filler to walk around on. For a couple of months. Because Restylane doesn’t last that long, you know, so you have to schedule regular fill-ups, at about $700 a pop.

And then there’s the vamp situation. I don’t know what has happened to that part of my foot that starts at my ankles and ends at my toes, but it has become VERY FINICKY about what is on it. I feel like Goldilocks trying to find a pair of shoes in the morning that will last the day. I can’t lace up my running shoes properly, because if I do I feel as if my feet are in a vise. Even now sitting here wearing socks and Crocs, I’m hyperaware of my feet. This can’t be right.

I used to mock old people who wore those hideous clunkers known as Earth Shoes. But you know, they may have the last laugh. Tonight I went out for drinks and dinner with a friend. I was more than pleased to see that it was raining, pouring in fact. The weather meant that I could, without shame, wear my Uggs, and my feet were, at least for tonight, quite happy.

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: Writing Creative Non-Fiction
Wed, 3/02/10 – 13:30 | No Comment

This year, the sixth annual BlogHer conference has a Writing Track, and as part of that track, there will be two Rooms of Your Own (ROYO).  If you have been to Blogher before, then you …

Pretty, the Series: A web mockumentary
Fri, 29/01/10 – 14:06 | 6 Comments
Pretty, the Series: A web mockumentary

Late in the evening when there’s absolutely nothing else on, I have found myself on occasion watching Toddlers & Tiaras. It’s one of those train wreck reality shows in which overweight parents groom their …

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: Revision, Looking At The Big Picture
Wed, 27/01/10 – 13:33 | No Comment

Here is the first essay/blog post that will be the subject of an on-going editing dialogue. This is the first draft, untouched by human hands, as it were. Your job is to read …

I’m Mad As Hell and I’d Like To Tase The Lot of Them
Fri, 22/01/10 – 17:46 | 6 Comments

Wanted: one taser that works through the television.  If I had had my hands on such a thing last night while watching the Newshour on PBS, I would not have suffered such a migraine headache …

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: The Miracle of Paragraphing
Tue, 19/01/10 – 18:29 | 8 Comments

Do you write short or long? Do you meander into a story, or just get right to the point? And does it make a difference? I’m asking this because I’ve been aware for …

A MidLifeBloggers Contest: Win a copy of Hormone Harmony
Fri, 15/01/10 – 17:56 | 5 Comments
A MidLifeBloggers Contest: Win a copy of Hormone Harmony

I have had an unwilling absence from the internet.  My cable went out.  Yesterday.  Or maybe the night before while I slept.  Of course I didn’t know that when, perky as could be, I took my coffee …

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: Facing The Page In The Long Gray Days of Winter
Wed, 13/01/10 – 1:39 | 5 Comments

It’s January, that cold gray endless month that follows the hey, everybody! glitz and tinsel of December.
Let’s pause for a moment while I get fully into my cold, gray, endless mood…
Okay, I’m there.
So–how are all …

Great Interview Experiment: DaVe from FupDuckTV
Fri, 8/01/10 – 16:52 | No Comment

The sideboob & underboob article is a debate that I’ve been kicking around for a while now with friends.

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: Writing as a Relationship
Wed, 6/01/10 – 14:38 | 3 Comments

“Patricia Highsmith….lost her form. The problem wasn’t the supposed confines of crime writing, but her increasing refusal–in love and in work–to let a relationship happen. And art is always about relationship–to the material, …

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: A Christmas Gift
Wed, 23/12/09 – 12:55 | No Comment

Yes, yes, yes–I know that everyone is overwhelmed with the holidays.  But really, you shouldn’t close your writer’s eye at such a rich time.  So, here’s another exercise that you can do in your mind, …

Wednesday Writer’s Workshop: The Tao of Word Choice
Tue, 15/12/09 – 13:39 | 4 Comments

As writers, all we have to work with is our words.  They’re the currency of our craft; we use them to say, to show, to explain, to tell, to create an idea or a world …

Giveaway: Readers for those with Short-Arm Syndrome
Fri, 11/12/09 – 11:10 | 16 Comments
Giveaway: Readers for those with Short-Arm Syndrome

My mom developed a vision problem when I was a kid, and I remember that it really scared me. Her arms got too short to be able to look up numbers in the telephone …