Comments on: Get Your Words Off Me

By: TG

TG — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 18:42:43 +0000

P.S. I WROTE A LETTER, FOR HIM, ABOUT ALL MY FEELINGS AND HIS ABUSE THAT I WILL GIVE HIM, SOMEDAY. IT TOTALY LIFTED A BIG BURDEN OFF OF ME, JUST WRITTING EVERYTHING DOWN. IT MADE ME FEEL SO MUCH BETTER GETTING IT ALL OUT… EVEN IF IT’S JUST ON PAPER.

By: TG

TG — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 18:29:30 +0000

WOW, I’M GLAD I CAME ACROSS THIS BLOG. I JUST LEFT MY HUSBAND A MONTH AGO, WE WERE TOGETHER ALMOST 12 YEARS. HE DOESN’T UNDERSTAND HIS BELITTLING, DISRESPECT, AND LACK OF TRUST FOR ME HAS BEEN PUSHING ME AWAY FOR YEARS…BECAUSE “HE LOVES ME SO MUCH”…
YOU SAID SO MUCH I CAN RELATE TO. HE IS SELFISH AND I’M GLAD I FINALY GOT OUT, ALREADY I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER. I CAN SAY OR DO WHAT I WANT, OR GO SOMEWHERE WITHOUT LOOKING OVER MY SHOULDER OR HOPE IT’S OK WITH HIM. I CAN GO ON AND ON… I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU FOR PUTTING THIS OUT THERE. HOPEFULLY, OTHERS WILL READ THIS AND “FREE” THEMSELVES SOONER THAN LATER!
THANKS LAURA G.!

By: Tricia

Tricia — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 03:53:18 +0000

Thank you for sharing this story. TOO often, people think you have to bleed in order to feel humiliated and abused, and they’re sooo wrong. My husband and I recently co-authored a three-part series of articles about family violence, including men’s violence against women. I’ve started including links from stories like this so that people can see how their words and courage to share their experiences can help others…it takes lots of voices.

By: Laura G.

Laura G. — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 19:50:16 +0000

The one thing, unfortunately, that I have discovered, is that we each need to slide up and out of this rock of abuse in our own time. But listening to other people’s stories seems to be a strong motivating factor to wake-up and decide how to move forward.

By: jhenz

jhenz — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 05:52:54 +0000

After reading your post, I could say, you should have met this woman about this article: Love in Hell (http://www.authspot.com/Journals/Love-in-Hell.190291) and probably, you could have also gave her a piece of your mind.

It may be that they differ in situations, but as you pointed matter-of-factly… Abuse — physically or verbally, is abuse.

By: Laura G.

Laura G. — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 02:14:23 +0000

Michelle, oh, if only we would listen to those little voices crying out DANGER DANGER in our heads and not the whirlwind of romance. Maybe it is our incredibly powerful optimism, or the lines we keep hearing about the power of love. No, love does not conquer all.

Divorcing for the kids: at a certain point I realized that I need my daughters to know that I stood up for myself. And the lessons I needed to convey to them: that they should not act like that, and that no one should act like that with them.
Laura

By: Laura G.

Laura G. — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 02:06:07 +0000

Suzy Q–I’m so sorry that we have this in common, and not the joy of being happily married.

My advice: listen to the advice that people give you, but don’t expect anyone to be able to give you advice that you can take as is. And this is a problem, because we are used to doing what other people say, because we think that is what a good woman is supposed to do. Now is the time to consider what people say, and think about it and FEEL if it is right for you, or how it can be made right for you. If you feel it is right to wait, wait until you feel ready. This is your time and your life.

Also, the divorce process is long, and if he is controlling, then he is going to want to control that process as well.

A big part of leaving, even if not physically or legally, is that mindset, that understanding within yourself. Find strength in your having the belief that you deserve better, that you are a deserving woman.

Laura

By: Laura G.

Laura G. — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 01:53:07 +0000

Sure, you can also go to and link to my blog, http://www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com, for more excerpts from my book, “Get Your Hands Off Me.” There are other posts, not from the book, there in addition to, believe it or not, some humorous stuff.
Laura