Comments on: MidLife Therapy: A Shrink In A Book

By: Cecilia

Cecilia — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 04:22:47 +0000

I’ll admit to the ants-in-the-pants syndrome and it definitely has caused me some missteps along the way. Just when I think I’m old enough to know better….

By: starrlife

starrlife — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 14:07:01 +0000

My mid-life crisis was getting married and having a child! I’m kind of backwards sometimes! But I can always use intermittent therapy:)

By: Twenty Four At Heart

Twenty Four At Heart — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 21:58:33 +0000

Changing course midstream … possible, but not always so easy. And yes, it does seem like there’s societal pressure to be all things to everyone – and perfectly at that. Again, I think my accident put some of this in perspective for me. Maybe a few positives actually did come out of such a negative incident in my life. It’s terrible to think it takes a tragedy to bring perspective … but I do tend to be more low-key about my expectations now. More grateful for the smallest of things….

By: Twenty Four At Heart

Twenty Four At Heart — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 21:53:51 +0000

I do the same thing on some days. At other times I think, “Life is short, I could die tomorrow,” and I want to live just for that day. Having been in a severe car accident 2- 1/2 years ago, I know how life can change dramatically in just an instant. Now I try to plan for the future but I am much more conscience about living in each day also. Sometimes it’s hard to find that balance.

By: Twenty Four At Heart

Twenty Four At Heart — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 21:50:50 +0000

I think my problem is that I’m interested in too many things. It’s so hard to narrow down my choices. I think, perhaps, growing up is over-rated!

By: Allison

Allison — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:49:02 +0000

Yes, I’ve come to the conclusion that midlife crises happen because you’ve come far enough to see the cumulative effects of all those little decisions you’ve made that seemed PERfectly reasonable at the time, but have somehow brought you someplace completely WRONG! Not at all where you expected to be. And by then of course, you’re far enough along that you also realize you don’t have lots of time to fix it.

The good news is at least we have added a good 10 maybe 15 years extra to do something about it since most of us are healthier and living longer. So, I choose (maybe delusionally) to think I can still do some of that stuff, I just can’t waste time. Of course, that comes with its own built in pressures…when did this push to ‘be all we can be’ become an expectation that puts all this pressure on us anyway?

I sometimes think ignorance is bliss is really the way to go….

By: Laura

Laura — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 23:14:54 +0000

Well, I have decided to reterm midlife crisis to crisis at midlife, which I think is more reflective of what happens. At around 40-ish I got a master’s degree, got a job in a different field, got divorced and changed countries. But with all of that movement, I still find that I have ants in my pants–I want to do things, but now, finally I am concerned about retirement. That, for me, is having the biggest impact on my thoughts and plans. Up until now I still thought I had time to do what I want, travel the world, but no, now I worry about what will be in 20 years. Who knows who I will be then, and thinking about it makes me even more stressed. I feel that this realization has cut all connection to youthful fantasies and has ground me into a horrible crisis, a crisis of this being it. And this is not the midlife I expected for myself. Tough realization.

By: Liz@Inventing My Life

Liz@Inventing My Life — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 22:39:15 +0000

I’m right there with you on the “what do I want to be when I grow up” dilemma. I’m hoping to have it figured out any day now, maybe even before I turn 45…