http://midlifebloggers.com/2009/04/13/international-adoption-the-wait/ Wed, 16 Mar 2016 03:05:21 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.4.2 http://midlifebloggers.com/2009/04/13/international-adoption-the-wait/comment-page-1/#comment-5993 Sun, 23 May 2010 02:21:47 +0000 http://midlifebloggers.com/?p=1054#comment-5993 My husband and I have been waiting to adopt from our “sure thing” country China for 3 years. I am now 42 and definitly losing my happy whatever will be will be attitude. I never thought I would actually be worried I will be a 50 yr old with a child in kindergarten but it looks like this is going to be my reality. I have felt like all I have done is try to figure out what I want in my life, what I want to do, how to clean out all the negatives and live fullfilled. I have had everything from career changes to staying home to going to night school to starting my own home business, setting new bounderies and cleaning house from toxic friends, getting a dog, to making the decision to adopt at the age of 38. When do you finally say I am at peace. When does this yearning and edge ever go away. One day I want adventure and different, the party girl the next I want to be a mom bringing my child to storytime. Now the dog has died I embrased 40 when it came but now I’m 42 I have never really fit with my friends going through motherhood and now all the midlife girls have teenage issues with their kids and I’m still waiting to find out if I’ll be a mom by 45. I can say I am second guessing all this not only will our child have parents close to 50 but grandparents reaching 80 aswell as cousins they will no longer be able to play or bond with because they will be in highschool and university.
When does this so called journey end and when do we reach the destination.

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