The Invisible Older Woman

It’s a well-known and much bemoaned fact that one of the consequences of aging is that you seem to become invisible. In arenas where you once held sway, no one pays much attention to you. It’s disconcerting at first and then maddening and then it becomes one of the favorite subjects that midlife and beyond women rail against. I have a different view of the whole invisible older woman issue, one that makes it one of the bonuses of getting older.

Tagged as: aging, benefits of aging, eternal youthfulness, freedom, invisible older women, midlife issues, self-acceptance, YouTube

  • Pingback: Less is More in Midlife and Beyond | Bubby Joys and Oys

  • Lydia

    I am currently writing up my PhD thesis on the well-being of midlife women, and the picture certainly isn’t bleak. As women transition through mid-life, they report that they feel a greater sense of purpose in life, they experience more positive emotions, and they grow in self-compassion. Although I am only 28 years old, I feel as if younger generations can learn from these impressive emotional and mental qualities that midlife women possess.

    • http://midlifebloggers.com janegassner

      Thanks for the good news from academia, Lydia! I’m curious as to what sparked your interest in this topic. When I was working on my PhD, it was said that your dissertation choice was pretty much a Rorschach test. Mine was on political power and early American women novelists–it fits!

      • Lydia Brown

        I am interested in meditation, and whenever I would go to a class or attend a retreat, I would be surrounded by midlife women. “Why are these women interested in the inner world?” I kept asking myself. Perhaps it is a ripe time of life for inner growth, and personal development – with kids gaining independence, and the likelihood of greater financial freedom than in the past.. I also wondered what resources these women could draw on to face the challenges that present at this time of life (menopause, ageing parents, a changing relationship with a life partner that isn’t centred around the kids…) this led to the conception of my topic.

  • Pingback: Less is More – in Midlife and Beyond | Bubby Joys and Oys

  • http://www.AnyShinyThing.com/ Lynne Spreen

    I like everything you said except the part about having to slip offstage to give our daughters their time. There should be room in civilization for all of us. But the thing about having freedom? Priceless.

    • http://midlifebloggers.com janegassner

      I started to create a metaphor about different stages for different ages, Lynne, and then I realized Shakespeare did it for me several hundred years ago. So following on from him, how about if we don’t slip offstage so much as move to our own stage. We’re still the queens, but in another venue.

      • http://www.AnyShinyThing.com/ Lynne Spreen

        I like it!

  • Miriam Hendeles

    Love this Jane. I think about this a lot and as much as I feel vital and energetic now and always have, I am sometimes concerned how I will feel as I get older and get “pushed aside” by the younger generation…(I think “am I nice to those older than me now? How do I treat my own Mother-in-law when she expresses her opinions?…how do I think of the “elderly”…?). I love your viewpoint because bottom line what really matters is what we think of ourselves…and if that’s a good attitude then it really doesn’t matter what others think. Now, it’s annoying when they don’t seem to value our comments at lectures etc…but really that’s their problem. So go! Let’s all go and be strong…and it’s not a bad thing to let the younger ones have a voice…that’s also gracious. I feel good when my own MIL listens to me and values me too…everyone gets her turn in life….sorry for the long rambling…but this topic really touched a chord. Thanks!

    • http://midlifebloggers.com janegassner

      Miriam,
      A post for another day is about my realizing how my younger self’s attitude toward older people is impacting my own aging.

Previous post:

Next post: