by Liz of Inventing My Life
On Saturday I went to an information session for Wide Horizons for Children, an adoption agency; today I filled out their registration form and will drop it in the mail on Monday. One step down, about a thousand left to go!
I’ve been collecting information on agencies for about a month or so now, and I kept coming back to Wide Horizons as the place that felt right. First of all, their website had a lot of good information that laid everything out very clearly. They even had a section specifically for singles, which made it clear that they were open to working with single parents – not every agency I looked at was that welcoming to singles. Then when I started sending out emails requesting more information from various agencies, they responded very quickly and I received a packet from them in the mail within a day or two of my email request. Some agencies never even responded to my request for information, and one agency took about three weeks to send me anything in the mail! Those agencies got crossed off my list very quickly. The information packet from Wide Horizons was also very good, comprehensive without being overwhelming, and the fee structure was very clearly spelled out. Finally, their materials didn’t make any overt references to religion in general or Christianity in particular – many of the other agencies that I came across while doing research seem to have a strong religious affiliation, and I know that many people who choose to adopt look for that when choosing an agency but I am not at all comfortable with it. I immediately ruled out any agency that had the word “angels” in its name, and there were quite a few that did!
In the adoption process, you have to have your homestudy and post-placement reports done by an agency that is licensed in your state, but you can work with any agency anywhere for the actual placement of the child. I decided that that was almost too much flexibility for me – it would mean twice as much research if I had to choose two different agencies! So the other thing I like about Wide Horizons is that they are located here in Massachusetts, which means I can use them for the whole process. They also do a lot of cultural activities and events, so they will be a resource as my child grows up. They’ve been doing adoptions for a long time and have a good track record, they also work in several different countries and more than one of those countries is open to adoption by single parents. Parents can apply to more than one country for no extra fee, which increases your chances of being matched with a child quickly.
“Wait times” are a big issue in the adoption world, and on many of the adoption Yahoo groups that I read people are always asking about the wait times for healthy baby girls at various agencies. The wait times for Wide Horizons are a little longer than for some other agencies out there, but that was a very minor consideration in my decision making. While I’m impatient to get the ball rolling on the process, I think I will be okay with waiting for an official referral of a child – it will give more time to save money, get my house in order, and generally prepare for the new arrival. I may be singing a different tune once I’m actually in the waiting process, but right now it’s not a factor for me and I would rather work with an agency that has a lot of experience and that I feel comfortable with than with one that is promising to deliver a child ASAP.
I brought my friend Pat to the information session with me, partly so she could ask all the difficult questions and partly so I wouldn’t feel so alone in a sea of married couples. But when we got there, there was only one married couple and four single women including me – maybe I’m not the pioneering oddball I thought I was! Both Pat and I had a good feeling about the social worker who did the presentation and about the agency overall, and having Pat there to listen objectively made me feel better about my own decision that this is the right agency for me to work with.
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