Late in the evening when there’s absolutely nothing else on, I have found myself on occasion watching Toddlers & Tiaras. It’s one of those train wreck reality shows in which overweight parents groom their small children to compete in obscure beauty pagents usually held in the Deep South. I feel guilty about watching it, at the same time as I’m fascinated.
I could say I’m looking for the sociological cues to the degeneration of our blah blah blah society, but really, I’m just hooked on the train wreck aspects. Like, how young is too young for a professional head to toe spraytan? (Answer: you’re never too young for the tanning booth) Or, what are the opthamalogical issues related to gluing several layers of false eyelashes onto a four year old? (Answer: who cares–don’t it make her baby blue eyes stand out all nice and purty for the camera.)
Soon, however, I will be able to gorge guilt-free. There’s a new webseries coming out in February called Pretty, a mockumentary, which takes on the world of kiddie beauty pageants. I got invited to the premier, but since the 350 plus miles to Los Angeles was a tad far to travel, the producers let me see the first couple of episodes in the privacy of my MacBook. It was pretty much an LOL event.
The setup is this: heading for the Miss Stars Eyes Pageant is Michael Champagne (Sam Pancake), the swishy but proud papa of Annette (Stacy McQueen), and husband of Ribina (Dee Freeman), who supports the family as a professional smoker. Not the least of the comedic twists in the setup is the fact that five year old Annette (think Funicello) is played by an adult. Written and directed by the crticially-acclaimed Steve Silverman, who says, “It’s ‘Little Miss Sunshine‘ meets ‘Reno 911′ meets everything that’s politically incorrect, but just a whole heck of a lot of fun to say out loud in the world today.”
The whole shebang starts on February 1st, when episodes can be viewed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at www.prettytheseries.com To get a taste of it, go there right now and watch the trailer.
I promise you you’ll LOL too.
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