by msmeta of Adventures at Midlife

The National Women’s Law Center just released the results of a poll indicating that “women are significantly more pessimistic than men in their attitudes about the status quo in America, both on a societal level and in terms of their own lives.”

“Women are more likely than men to feel that they are falling behind economically, and are more likely than men to be worried and concerned about their economic prospects,” the release reported. (In other words: Once again, women are MORE IN TOUCH WITH REALITY!)

The cure? “Regardless of age, income, and education, more than half of women (55%) feel that the government should do more to solve problems and help meet people’s needs.” The press release then goes on to outline an ambitious plan for closing the wage gap for women, reducing the number of uninsured women and children, expanding access to birth control, reducing the number of women at the poverty line and reforming the judiciary in favor of pro-women judges — all based on new or improved federal legislation.

Pardon me while I heave … a great sigh. Sorry, y’all, but that dog just don’t hunt no more. I’ve been waiting for more than 30 years for just the wage gap to close, and that issue has had legislation in place since 1963! I wasn’t even in the workplace then! (Corporate America has a large bag of tricks and excuses to help it slide around the issue, including making salary schedules a secret and being notoriously difficult to sue.)

I’m not against federal or state legislation on social issues, especially if the community need is dire, the status quo egregious, and the legislation well reasoned and full of teeth. It’s just that, at this stage in my life, looking down the short road at 60, I can’t wait for any government entity to make it all better.

I’m glad that my parents of The Greatest Generation have had access to Social Security and Medicare, and I have hopes of a more stable economic future for my children and grandchildren. But I think we of the gradually graying hair and creaking knees may be on our own, at least for now. Obama talks about exempting seniors from income tax if they make less than $50,000 (which wouldn’t help me), and McCain remains popular among seniors, who think he will be sympathetic to their needs. But I don’t expect either one to swoop in and rescue us. I think we’ll have to just rescue ourselves.

I’ve actually gotten pretty good at it over the years. Since starting out in the ’70s, I’ve had few mentors, and almost no women models for how I wanted to “do” my life. So I just did it. Between the demands and needs of a spouse, children, home, job, etc., I created a life. Sometimes it had baby spit, spilled Coke, tears or duct tape holding it all together, but it worked.

I expect the future to be the same. I see people who are several years ahead of me on the retirement scale making some interesting choices and adjustments. Several friends, despite protests from extended families, have sold off the old homestead in favor of smaller, more manageable digs. A neighbor couple who were having a hard time making ends meet on his government pension recently took in an elderly woman as a boarder, and it seems to be working out well for all three of them.

My husband’s colleague negotiated for a package that included several years of working part-time before retiring based on his full-time income. My elderly mother enjoyed a “senior companion” — paid for by a county agency — who would drop in a few times a week to play cards or run errands for her. We all know people who have turned hobbies into occupations, often making extensive use of the Web. Three generations of one family I’m acquainted with live in one house, taking care of each other, sharing everything and learning daily how to make it work.

These are the easier choices. Some choices are harder, such as divorcing a dear but severely disabled spouse in order for him or her to qualify for adequate insurance or Medicaid benefits, or finally cutting loose a loved one who is draining off personal and financial resources. It’s difficult, but it’s done.

I’m not certain what The Spouse and I will have to do when the time comes. I suspect making some sort of part-time income for a time will be part of the mix, as well as downsizing some plans and expectations. But I’m not looking for Uncle Sam to come rolling in on a tank anytime soon to solve my personal financial problems.