BlogHer 2013: Mostly Good, No Bad, A Little Meh

The last time I went to BlogHer in 2009, I titled my roundup post BlogHer 2009: The Good, The Bad, and the Meh. That seems equally applicable this year as far as categories go. As for what’s in those categories–ah, four years makes all the difference.

The Good, 1:

I did not sign up for the whole conference. My complaints about past BlogHers were that the sessions never fulfilled their promise. This year I decided I wouldn’t even buy in to that promise. So I have nothing to say–good, bad or meh–about the two days of sessions.

I did sign up for the Pathfinder Day and that was well worth the money. I missed Kathleen Sebelius speaking at the Breakfast because–I didn’t know there was a breakfast for the day. Keeping track of what I could participate in and what I couldn’t proved one of the problems of not having a full conference badge. The Keynote One to One interview with Maria Ross was worth more to me probably than hearing anything Sebelius might say.

I’d never heard of Ross, so when the moderator started off by asking her to talk about something that had happened to her five years ago, I barely listened. When I started paying attention was when I realized that the story Ross was telling was my story as well: ruptured cerebral aneurysm, weeks in ICU, rehab, etc etc etc. When the interview was finished–and I had bought Ross’s book, Rebooting My Brain: How A Freak Aneurysm Reframed My Life–I knew I had to start writing about my own experience. That’s a journey I will be taking in the next months–and trust me, it’s a journey that I have no idea where it’s going.

What you and your media company can expect to earn for various services

The actual breakout sessions for the Pathfinders Day were titled “My Blog As A Media Company.” I don’t know that my blog is or wants to be a media company, but the sessions, led by Jaden Hair and MJ Tam, were full of specific information that will be useful. In the years since I was last at a BlogHer, I’ve gone to other conferences that were smaller. This Pathfinders Day felt like them, and I appreciated that.

The Networking Lunch and Keynote, “Which Came First: Doing Good or Feeling Good,” was a discussion with Bryant Terry and Nataly Kogan, led by Elisa Camahort Page. Again I was caught unawares by the way the topic continues to resonate with me. The gist of what I took away was that rather than having a single definition, happiness is a term relative to each of us. It’s in the aggregation of the small things that happen throughout the day that make us say, “yes.” What I’d never thought of till the Keynote was the importance of noting those small things, not just a nod at the moment, but a concrete expression, preferably written down. I will be doing that, at least privately, from now on.

The Good, 2:

Because for so many years, I was practically the only one focusing on midlife, I never felt there was really a place for me at BlogHer. Times have sure changed, however, and the midlife/boomer crowd was this time, well, booming.  There was a large contingent of us anywhere I went, so the days of walking into an event and having to make a place for  myself in a large group of women–.

Let me tell you about my first BlogHer in 2006. I knew no one, but, hey, I’m a friendly sort. We were gathering poolside and I went up to a table of women who were just sitting down. “May I join you,” I asked, about ready to sit. “No,” one of them answered, “we’re a private group.” I wish I could say that this was an isolated experience for me at the subsequent BlogHers I attended, but it wasn’t. Despite being founded by three warm, friendly, women-centered feminists, BlogHer somehow breeds a vibe that is part Mean Girl, part Sorority Snob.

The irrepressible PK Fields (l) and Lisa Weldon (r)

This year, however, I had my tribe wherever I went: Janie Emaus and I shared a flight there and back; Lisa Weldon and I shared a room at the Sheraton. I hung with Cathy Chester, Helene Cohen Bludman, Lois Alter Mark and my other cohorts at the ever-thriving Better After 50,   Generation Fabulous, and Grown and Flown. Boombox Network had a fabulous party for us, the B(l)oomers Party, which you will be hearing about from me in future posts.

So many of my CreativeAlliance ’12 tribe were there as well. I volunteered in the Serenity Suite, which meant that I got to spend two hours of uninterrupted conversation with Ellie Schoenberger. I sat next to Lora Jakobsen at the Voices of the Year, which meant that I got to spend time with her before she took off for Denmark. Those were two of my Happy Moments. And in passing, I got huge hugs from Robin O’Bryant, Melissa Lanz and Heather King. Those huge hugs are the secret sign of our Creative Alliance!

The Good, 3:

I bought a ticket to the Expo and was absolutely thrilled to see how it has grown up over the past four years. In ’09, it seemed to me that almost all the brands were pitching to mothers of young children. This year, not at all. And in ’09, the brands were mostly interested in selling us their products. This year they were interested in forming relationships with bloggers that were mutually beneficial. Bravo, BlogHer’13; bravo brands.

The Bad:

Frankly, there wasn’t any. And that, I think, is a function of my not having bought a full Conference ticket. I got to avoid the huge crowds, the babble of voices, the attitude–both of earnestness and ambition. I wasn’t disappointed by the sessions as I had been in the past, because I didn’t go to them. I didn’t feel let down, left out and cheated at the parties, because I didn’t go to them. For my money (yes, indeed), BlogHer has gotten too too way too big. I think there were about 400+ at BlogHer’06. It was in a small hotel in San Jose. Most of the networking took place by the pool. I still miss that.

The Meh:

Ellie Schoenberger at VOTY

While I enjoyed the Voices of the Year (although I was amazed at how many of those reading were former or current BlogHer staff and editors), I did not enjoy waiting three-quarters of an hour for Queen Latifah to show up to do a half-assed job of moderating it. I particularly did not enjoy after having waited that three-quarters of an hour having to listen to an overly-loud promo for her new talk show. I found it incredibly ironic that Jory Des Jardins in introducing the Queen said how important the Voices of the Year event is to BlogHer’s mission. “The most important thing we do,” I think she called it. If actions speak louder than words, then the most important part of VOTY this year was getting the get, the bragging rights to landing Queen Latifah. The actual speakers, though, especially those who came at the end and presented to a shrinking audience, seemed a bit further down on the food chain for the powers that be at BlogHer.

All told though, I got out of BlogHer’13 exactly what I went for. I had a good time, learned a lot about a little, talked to the brands that interested me, and spent four days with friends and friends-to-be. And I learned that these big group gropes really aren’t for me. This was my fifth BlogHer; I don’t know that there will be a sixth for me.

 

 

 

 

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Tagged as: blogging, blogher'06, BlogHer09, BlogHer13, cerebral aneurysm, conferences, midlife relationships, midlifebloggers